Have I Just Forgotten?

I cannot believe that the sweet, docile little lump of sugar, formally known as Nicholas, has turned into this energizer baby we have to always be on the look out for. I am sure Patrick was calmer than this! I don't recall Patrick trying to open the back door, ever, especially before he could even stand alone. I don't recall Patrick trying to touch things on the stove or open the oven door. I don't recall Patrick trying to play in the toilet or crawl through the cat door. I don't remember Patrick screaming for attention or beating us with his open hands. I spent an hour and a half tonight trying to get Nicholas to bed. He would not take his afternoon nap, so he was overly tired. He has taken to having two dinners and two bottles lately, and I made the mistake tonight of trying to skip the second dinner because he had his first dinner later than usual. I tried rocking him...this is funny because when Patrick was born, I did not want one of those hideous gliders. No, I had to find this high backed, cow hide seated "for looks only" rocking chair on Main Street. Patrick turned out to be the baby that wanted to be rocked and rocked and rocked. Chuck cursed that rocking chair every single night that he had to sit in it rocking our sweet first born to sleep. So, this time, I was smarter and registered for the most wonderful plush glider ever known to man (Thank you MIL). It is like rocking on a cloud. But, guess what? Nicholas is not a rocker. From day one, he either screamed and stretched out until you laid him down or he would just giggle and pull my hair. Singing? Forget that! He sings along with me and trys to put his binky in my mouth or just sticks his finger in my nose. He has let me rock him to sleep two times in the past 11 1/2 months and he was sick at the time. So tonight, as most nights, I try anyways. After that, I tried to hold him down in his bed (gently), and what does he do? He grabs my arm and pulls it to his mouth to make zerbert noises and then he giggles at me as he throws his binky out of the crib. AHHH, motherhood!

Emotional Day

Let me start from the beginning...the first time I saw Nicholas from the other side of the C-Section curtain, I said "What is wrong with his head?" My OB was like "Nothing, sometimes their a little smushed at full-term". (Patrick was 7 weeks early and had the most beautiful head you have ever seen, in my opinion) So, for the last 11 1/2 months, I have questioned my pediatrician about his head and all of its problems. He assured me all was ok and just to keep putting him on his left side. My MIL has made several comments about possibly seeing a specialist, but I felt confident my pediatrician knew enough about the matter and that he would send us there if it was really necessary. Well, fast forward to two weeks ago when Kelli F. (who used to see Dr. K) found out that one of her sons has a condition that has been noticeable since birth and her other son has another condition that will probably require surgery. This same doctor blew her off, too, and told her to not worry. After talking to Kelli a few weeks ago, I started doing research on head shapes in infants and found out that severe flattening on the right back side (or left) can cause the forehead bones to push down on an eye and make it appear droopy. This was so disheartening to me, because I have noticed this eye problem with Nicholas from day one. I have been calling him a baby white version of Forrest Whittaker for months now. So anyways, we went today and found out that Nicholas has four different diagnosis involving the shape of his head. He should not have the slope in the front, the flattenedd diagonal slope on the back right side, the protruding bones above his ears (that is why they stick out!) and the back left bone protrusion. Needless to say I was heartbroken, guilt ridden and angry when I left. Yes, I know I should be thankful there is still time to treat this condition. But I am angry at my pediatrician. To further complicate the matter, I called their office and asked them to speed up the process of sending a letter of medical necessity to our insurance, only to be talked down to by my pediatrician. He told me they were wrong. He said that they would find fault with any baby's skull and they were just trying to make money. He said they didn't even have this 20 years ago...it's not a big deal. He said I needed to go somewhere else for another opinion. He questioned whether my insurance would even pay (I called last week...I have a $200.00 deductible...it is a $3,000.00 procedure). He was demeaning toward me. I know I had a tone in my voice, but you know what? He is a professional. He works for me and my insurance company. I don't deserve that big man/shut up you hysterical woman attitude. If we had gone to this place six months ago, Nicholas band time would be way shorter and progress chances would have been way better. I will never not go with my gut instinct regarding my children's health again. And maybe to Dr. K, it is just the shape of his head, but to me, it is the difference between ear infections, sinus trouble, TMJ and migraine headaches. Call me crazy, but I know my husband would be happy not to have sinus trouble and I could sure stand to be without my TMJ. We would have done well to have bands, too.

Veggies

Dinner time has become entertainment time at our house as of late. Seeing a baby eat table food without teeth is quite a sight (and mess!). Here are some pictures from last night's show.

Do you like my zucchini broach?

Two hands are always better than one!

Yea for broccoli!

Friday, we went to our local spring festival. The weather was great. I loved seeing the Clydesdales and we also enjoyed a white tiger feeding. Patrick had his traditional funnel cake. Nicholas really enjoyed the funnel cake, too!

Mothers Day & Picture Catch Up

I love being a mom. It is my greatest reward in life. It is my most important job along with being a wife, too! There is absolutely no greater joy than my three guys....

P.S. I love you, Mom (Na Na) & Mel (Grandma), too. Thanks for setting such a great example!

Patrick's kinder program "You're a grand ole flag, you're a high flying flag..."

It's a Boy!

Richard and Brandi (my brother and SIL) are having a boy! They found out Monday. Yea! Nicholas will have a playmate.

24 Hours With Out Power

We have lost our power before. I think the longest was 7 hours. That was a nuisance, but paled in comparison to Wednesday night and all day Thursday. I learned many things from our little experience. I learned that Patrick is way too dependent on TV. I think his words were "I don't know what to do with out TV" (yikes! that is scary) I learned that a small generator can run two refrigerators (thanks to our neighbor, Ed, who offered to let us plug ours in) and we probably need to buy one as many power outages as we have in our neighborhood. I learned that after the refrigerator, the most important appliance in my life is the vacuum. Oh, how I could hardly stand not to be able to vacuum! I was crawling around on my hands and knees trying to free the floor of debris from Nicholas's open mouth. I was also fond of seeing so many people out and about on our block talking to one another and making sure people were ok. We tend to hole up in our homes and not communicate with one another which is kind of sad to me. But the biggest thing I learned during out 24 hours in the dark was this...there are way too many distractions in my life that I am letting keep me from a closer walk with God. I hope this will be a lesson to me to have a pure mind free of clutter from the outside world. I watch too much TV and probably could spend less time on the internet. Should I die tomorrow, I have to wonder if God would ask me, "Why could you not give Me 20 minutes a day? What was so important that I was not the priority?"