Emotional Day

Let me start from the beginning...the first time I saw Nicholas from the other side of the C-Section curtain, I said "What is wrong with his head?" My OB was like "Nothing, sometimes their a little smushed at full-term". (Patrick was 7 weeks early and had the most beautiful head you have ever seen, in my opinion) So, for the last 11 1/2 months, I have questioned my pediatrician about his head and all of its problems. He assured me all was ok and just to keep putting him on his left side. My MIL has made several comments about possibly seeing a specialist, but I felt confident my pediatrician knew enough about the matter and that he would send us there if it was really necessary. Well, fast forward to two weeks ago when Kelli F. (who used to see Dr. K) found out that one of her sons has a condition that has been noticeable since birth and her other son has another condition that will probably require surgery. This same doctor blew her off, too, and told her to not worry. After talking to Kelli a few weeks ago, I started doing research on head shapes in infants and found out that severe flattening on the right back side (or left) can cause the forehead bones to push down on an eye and make it appear droopy. This was so disheartening to me, because I have noticed this eye problem with Nicholas from day one. I have been calling him a baby white version of Forrest Whittaker for months now. So anyways, we went today and found out that Nicholas has four different diagnosis involving the shape of his head. He should not have the slope in the front, the flattenedd diagonal slope on the back right side, the protruding bones above his ears (that is why they stick out!) and the back left bone protrusion. Needless to say I was heartbroken, guilt ridden and angry when I left. Yes, I know I should be thankful there is still time to treat this condition. But I am angry at my pediatrician. To further complicate the matter, I called their office and asked them to speed up the process of sending a letter of medical necessity to our insurance, only to be talked down to by my pediatrician. He told me they were wrong. He said that they would find fault with any baby's skull and they were just trying to make money. He said they didn't even have this 20 years ago...it's not a big deal. He said I needed to go somewhere else for another opinion. He questioned whether my insurance would even pay (I called last week...I have a $200.00 deductible...it is a $3,000.00 procedure). He was demeaning toward me. I know I had a tone in my voice, but you know what? He is a professional. He works for me and my insurance company. I don't deserve that big man/shut up you hysterical woman attitude. If we had gone to this place six months ago, Nicholas band time would be way shorter and progress chances would have been way better. I will never not go with my gut instinct regarding my children's health again. And maybe to Dr. K, it is just the shape of his head, but to me, it is the difference between ear infections, sinus trouble, TMJ and migraine headaches. Call me crazy, but I know my husband would be happy not to have sinus trouble and I could sure stand to be without my TMJ. We would have done well to have bands, too.